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Twilight and Her RIval, Anon, FUCKED at the Gala
By PatchCreated: 2026-01-27 07:55:59
Updated: 2026-01-31 10:28:18
Expiry: Never
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Anonymous Sun 11 Jan 2026 10:47:43 No.42946916
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Anon is Twilight's rival. There was no friendship problem he just showed up, they got into a cartoon dustball fight before he got thrown out of town until his next appearance the following season.
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>rivals since their mid-years at the school for gifted unicorns
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>constantly tried to one up each other's projects and reports
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>each time the 'winner' would gloat about it, leading to louder arguments that would always end in the dustball fights
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>eventually Twilight specialized as Celestia's closest student and Anon would go off into the world to further develop his magic in real world scenarios
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>fast forward to Ponyville (maybe mid season 2?)
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>one day a mysterious unicorn draped head to hoof in trinkets and carrying packed saddle bags of parchment arrives claiming to be investing the stories of harmony magic coming from the town
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>he's led to the Library where Twilight and friends are just coming back from some skirmish into the Everfree or something
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>the two lock eyes and stare at each other in disbelief
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"Anon?"
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"Twlight?"
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>the rest of the Six look between the two, waiting for either of them to start introducing themselves
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>AJ is the first ti speak up
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"Uh, this a friend o' yours, Twi-"
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>she doesn't even finish the question when the two charge at each other and start brawling like they did in school
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>"I figured out the Elements of Harmony before you did Anon! Clearly the superior unicorn wins again."
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"I bet Pinkie Pie helped you do that, which means that claim is debunked."
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>"Gasp!? How do you know Pinkie Pie?"
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"How do you think idiot? She's Pinkie Pie. Let me guess, the book was under 'E'."
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>"N-no!"
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"Let me guess, your nose is still so deep in those spell books you can only cast 25 of them?"
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>"Ha. Maybe a while ago when that Trixie came through town, I am now sitting at a respectable 50, so again, Ha."
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"50 spells!? That's not bad for a brown-nosing, tome hogging unicorn. Meanwhile I am sitting at 51."
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>"Jerk"
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"Teacher's pet"
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>"..Bully!"
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"Goody four shoes!"
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>"Shut up!"
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"You shut up!"
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>remainder of the episode is the girls trying to get these two to stop their fighting
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>Rainbow and Rarity try to help Twilight learn that having a professional rival doesn't mean having an enemy
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>AJ, Pink, and Fluttershy try to get Anon to see that just because they had a bad relationship in the past doesn't mean they haven't changed to be able to be friends now
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>seems like they're making progress
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>when they meet up again at the end of the day to try and makeup they get one inhale in before lunging at each other
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>"Dear Princess Celestia," as it pans to the girls watching on in disappointment, "Today I reconnected with an old classmate. He still hits like a girl!"
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>celestia overhearing twilight and rival!anon arguing for the fifth time today
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>be celestia
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>it's the grand galloping gala
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>you sip on your tea and pretend to be interested in whatever it is that a random noble is babbling about
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>suddenly there's a crash, the sound of glass breaking and ponies screaming
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>twilight and anon are fighting
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>again
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>what would normally be a figurative horn measuring contest turned into a full-on hoof fight between the two
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>applejack says that twilight threw the first hoof
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>you and everypony else watch the two roll around on the floor swearing, pulling manes and name calling
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>eventually twilight gets anon pinned to the ground while straddling him
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>the two pant and stare at each other for a minute before furiously kissing each other and hoofing at each other's clothes
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>you always thought the two should just fuck and get it over with, but you never expected it to happen on the floor in front of everypony during one of the biggest events of the year
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>you said you wanted something exciting to happen, but you didn't mean this
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>Be pink
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>Be tall
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>Be the loveliest one of all
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>Yep, you must be Cadance
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>And right now you're feeling... itchy?
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>There's a phantom itch somewhere in your horn
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>You can't quite tell why
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>It's driving you crazy
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>Is it some kind of... love sense being triggered?
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>It feels like love, but not quite
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>Probe at it with your magic
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>The feeling pings in your horn
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>It feels like...
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>You gasp, then a giddy smile splits your features
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>Is that Twilight?!
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>She's found love?!
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>Probe further
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>Your mind's eye lets you see the red string of destiny connecting her to her love!
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>It's a little faint, but it's there
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>You obviously can't resist knowing who her beau is
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>Who is the stallion that's captured Twilight's-
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>It's Anon
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>You shake your head
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>It can't be
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>You have nothing against him personally
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>But every time you babysat Twilight, Anon would be the first thing she'd rant about
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>You swear you could've milled wheat into flour in Twilight's mouth with how her teeth used to grind together
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>You check again; obviously you'd made a mista-
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>Still Anon
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>The pulsing, itching feeling intensifies
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>You come to a concerning conclusion after a few minutes
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>Okay...
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>Twilight and Anon are having sex
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>Right now
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>Wait, isn't the Grand Galloping Gala supposed to be happening right now?
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>yfw you read about the aftermath in the next morning's paper
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>yfw Shiny goes on the warpath after reading about the aftermath in the next morning's paper
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>be Twilight Sparkle, princess of friendship, national hero, magic prodigy, etc., etc.
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>now adding newly wed wife to list of titles
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>the husband? None other than the last pony you'd ever thought, or wanted, to have married just a year ago
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>Anonymous Cipher, unicorn second rate and near lifelong rival
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>even now as you're both riding in the regal chariot with a 'Just Married' banner stuck to it (thanks, Pinkie Pie) you still don't know how it came to this
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>even thinking about him used to make you scoff
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>talking to him was one of the few things that could send you into a flurry
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>but now here you are, holding his hoof and red in the face
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>neither of you can actually look at each other, though. Not since the kiss at the altar
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"How'd it end up like this?" you finally chime up as the villa you'll be sharing for the next few days comes into view
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>"Well," Anonymous responds with some thought, "First we met for the first time in years in Ponyville and caught up on a few years of fights we'd missed. Then we met again at the Gala, and... you know."
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>yep, you knew. As did everyone who was there in the main hall. And then everyone that read the next day's news
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"Which was you fault, for the record. We wouldn't have made such a scene if you hadn't started that argument about the Elements."
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>"You threw the first swing."
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"You kept calling my theories baseless."
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>"You kept throwing those backhoofed compliments at me."
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"They were not. You did look good, probably because it was the first time I'd ever seen you without that bed man you always have."
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>"It is not-!"
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>by now you were both over your earlier bashfulness and were staring each other down. Very closely, in fact
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>a few moments looking into each others' eyes and you turn away from each other again, even redder than before
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>"Anyway," Anon continues, trying to sound unfazed, "then a few days later your brother practically kidnaps me so your babysitter can tell us some nonsense about us being in love and a few months later here we are."
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>you snort
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"She's the princess of love, you know. You wouldn't say Princess Celestia speaks nonsense about the sun, would you?"
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>"--I guess."
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>you haven't let go of each other's hoof this whole time
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>you remember how much Cadance had been walking on egg shells when she spoke to you both
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>if anyone knew how much you couldn't stand Anon it was her
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>normally when she counsels new couples she's enthusiastic, beaming even
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>not this time. In fact it was hard for her to even make eye contact with either of you
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>unlike Shining, who had practically been glaring a hole through Anon the whole time
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>"-and you'll want to, uh, be open with one another and willing to lean on each other when you need to. Right, Shining?" she said with a nervous laugh
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>he nodded, at least. Slowly, and without taking his eyes off Anon. You swear you saw him getting ready to charge the guy a few times
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>Anon was trying to look like his usual listless self but he couldn't hide the bullets he was sweating
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>"Right. Umm..." she was desperately trying to find a way to get through this tangle of a situation "Oh! And with that I think we can move to the one on one part of the counseling!"
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>"The what?" You and Shining say in unison
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>Cadance elbowed Shining with a strained smile
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>"*oof* I mean- Right, the one on one! You and Twilight take as much time as you need, me and Anonymous here-"
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>"ACTUALLY," Cadance interrupted, putting herself between Shining and Anon, who was now hiding behind his chair, "I think it's best you and Twilight talk things over in the other room while I help Anonymous."
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>you and Shining gave each other an unsure look, but relented since it's not like either of you could bring up any real objection to it. Plus she was already pushing you both out the door
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>"Just be honest about how you feel, Twilight. I'm sure the answer's somewhere deep in your heart."
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>the last thing you see in the room before the door closes is Anon trying to sneak out of a window and being dragged back to the middle of the room by Cadance's magic
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>once it was just the two of you it became even more evident how awkward this whole thing was. How do you even approach something like this with your brother?
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>"Sssoooo," Shining strained to get any well articulated question out. "Was it just, you know, because he's the one you've known the longest?"
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"No. It was more like, like..."
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>the memory of Anon looking up at you with those dumb, deep green eyes
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>wearing that ridiculous gold trimmed cloak that perfectly went with his shade of green
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>no doubt getting ready to counter your expertly researched points with his own
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>feeling his chest against yours...
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>you threw your hooves over your head in frustration
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"Like I hate how he makes me feel!"
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>"Feels like even breathing gets harder to do when you think about him?" Shining asked after you've had time to let your outburst settle
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"Mhm. But now in a way where I can't even just brush it off like I used to. Once I start thinking about him I can't stop until something else snaps me out of it."
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>Shining puts a hoof on your shoulder "Yeah, that sounds like love at least. But you don't LOVE him love him, right?"
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"No!.. Maybe? Right now I just want to clobber him for doing this to me."
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>he scratched the back of his head trying to figure out how to comfort you. It's not like he ever wanted to 'clobber' Cadance
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>"You sure you want to even try this with him? I can probably throw him in boot camp for a while if you want."
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>you sigh
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"No, I'll at least TRY to make this work. If Cadance says it's love," you're never had such a hard time saying that word, "then there has to be something between us. What's the worst that can happen? We can stand being in the same room with each other?"
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>Shining pats your back and gives you a feint, but supporting smile. He knows he can trust you to figure this out
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"You still haven't told me what you and Cadance talked about that day, you know."
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>the carriage had stopped in front of the villa and the maids and butlers had come out to help you both with the luggage you had brought along
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>"Well that's because I don't want to talk about it."
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"Not even with your wife?"
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>it takes a lot of effort to not stumble over your words saying that out loud. Anon was clearly blindsided by that since he now looked like someone had knocked the wind out of him
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>"Okay, fine. Just don't tell her I told you this, alright?"
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>what?
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"What?"
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>"She's like a professional interrogator! She asked me if I'd cast some spell or blackmailed you since she didn't get how someone she knows you hate had gotten you to do something so 'un-lady like'. Maybe with a bit more colorful language, and with me unable to move. I was afraid I was going to be waterboarded or thrown in a dungeon."
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"Oh! Really? And you told her you didn't, right? That was on both of us."
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>"Of course. I told her the truth; It was just another one of our arguments like we'd always had, and by the end of it seeing you there in the light of the hall, wearing the proof you are as good at what you do as you say you are, it made me realize that you're-"
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>he needs some help finishing that sentence
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"'Just right for me'?"
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>"I'm pretty sure I said perfect."
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>is that a smile forming on your face?
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>does it look as nervous as the one forming on his face?
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>you should get inside before you start really spilling the proverbial spaghetti
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>kind of like how you did during your first real try at a date with Anon
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>it had taken a few days for you to even work up the nerve to suggest it (at the behest of your friends), which he did thankfully agree to. But you fell into your usual butting of heads over where it should take place
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>each of your suggestions was met with a derisive remark like 'Yeah, you would hang out there, wouldn't you?' and you similarly shot down his ideas
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>honestly, his loss if he doesn't want to experience the perfect hayburgers
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>Rarity and Cadance eventually came to the rescue by suggesting you try something classic. Candlelit dinner for two under the stars at one of Canterlot's finest restaurants
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>the idea was enthusiastically accepted on your behalves by the rest of the girls before you or Anon could object
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>not that you didn't try, it's just that by the time you could get a word in the whole thing had already been planned for the following evening
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"Doesn't this seem a bit much? Besides, I'd rather not be in Canterlot for a while since our, uh, 'love' bloomed so publicly there."
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>"And why tomorrow? Why not tonight?" Anon added. He must have been looking forward to the date more than you thought
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>"We'd need a day to get the reservation in, and I wouldn't worry too much about ponies remembering it by now, Twilight. We both know by now the talk of the town's moved on to whatever fashion flash is going around," Cadance assured you
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>you and Anon looked at each other, unsure whether to agree or back out
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>"I... guess it's not a terrible idea. Surely not all your friends can have the same bad idea at once."
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>you have him a light hoof to the shoulder and turned to the rest of the group
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"Okay, we'll try it. Tomorrow evening. Gives us some time to get ready. I'm guessing you had an idea of what I should wear for it, Rarity?"
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>"Maybe I had an idea or two," she said with as innocent a smile she could, "And, if you'd like, I could help you out as well, Anonymous."
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>"Huh? Oh, no thank you, I can handle that myself. No one knows how better to work with this than me," he replied, trying to nonchalantly strike a pose, making it very non-nonchalant in the process
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>this is who you fell in love with, Twilight
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>he awkwardly dropped it when he realized no one was impressed
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>"We can meet up in front of my house since I'm the one of us that still lives in Canterlot. That sound good to you?"
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>you agreed to his suggestion before you were whisked away (more like carried off) to Rarity's boutique
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>seeing him wave goodbye as you went made you realize you two had stopped doing your usual way of saying your goodbyes, turning your heads away from one another with a terse 'Hmph' and walking away without a word
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>deep down you hoped you wouldn't have to again
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>Rarity really is a wonder when she sets her mind to something. It only took a day for her to have a whole new outfit ready for you
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>a light red dress and embroidered saddle with some matching shoes and brooch, with a nice volume bump to your hair to round it out
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>a little more form fitting than you would have preferred, but she was too happy to see you wearing it to ask for a short notice change
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>the whole time your friends had been asking if you were one hundred and ten percent super duper certain if you wanted to go through with this
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"I'm certain. If I don't I'll just be stuck wondering what could have happened, and even if things go wrong we'll be able to put this whole thing behind us."
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>that actually stung a little to say
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>certainly gave you something to think about on the ride to Canterlot when the chariot came to pick you up just before sundown
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>you'd taken the pegasus pulled chariot plenty of times before so you knew the butterflies forming in your stomach weren't because of the ride
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>now looking back you know it was the idea thought of there not actually being anything between you and Anon growing into doubt and worry
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>what if you find out you two can barely keep a conversation going when you're not arguing? What if one of you ? what if he just can't do this and leaves mid-way through the date?
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>what if he just calls it off altogether?
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>what if you do?
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>you were so busy running these disaster scenarios in your mind you didn't realize the chariot had landed in front of Anon's house until one of the drivers tapped you on the shoulder to snap you out of it
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>you gave him a nervous thank you and smile as you climbed out of the chariot, nearly face planting as you found yourself now a little off balance in your shoes
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>not helped by how suddenly foreboding Anonymous' home looked. It wasn't really any different from the surrounding ones, but in the moment it was quickly becoming the scariest thing around
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>it was definitely your imagination getting the better of you, but the dimming evening and the lights from the windows almost made it seem like the house itself was leering at you
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>walking up the few steps to the front door in the long shadow the setting sun had given the building felt like walking miles
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>when you got to the door you had gotten jittery enough that your attempt to knock on the door resulted in you slamming your hoof on the door
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>fortunately your shock and embarrassment only lasted a few moments when you heard a few familiar, muffled voices coming from the upstairs window
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>"Oh, that must be her! I'll go check." the first voice was the least familiar, but you have an idea who that could be
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>"Nonono wait, I'll go!" That's Anon
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>"Stay still, Anon. I'm almost done, just need to get this last bit of your mane under control." Moon Dancer?
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>having your attention on the window the voices were coming from let you catch a glimpse at who the first voice belonged to
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>a unicorn mare, green coated and black maned like Anon, peeked her head out to see you at the door before darting back inside
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>"Yep, it's her. Don't worry she didn't see me. Hurry up with his mane."
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>Ah, that's right, his sister. You'd met her very few times since she didn't attend the school for gifted unicorns
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>you recall he'd described her as too mellow for the school when you'd asked him about it
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>"Aaand, done. Now go, don't keep her waiting!"
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>you could hear scrambling hoofsteps move out of the room, loudly clatter down a set of stairs, and run to the door
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>with a very audible throat clear the door finally opens, letting the light from inside brighten up where you were standing
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>and there was. Anonymous, actually looking quite dashing, but also doing his best to imitate the heroic pose of the painting you could clearly see behind him, complete with his eyes closed
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>"Twilight, welcome. I hope you're ready for our--"
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>he trailed off once he actually opened his eyes to look at you
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>his effort to look regal fell apart and he was making no effort to hide how his eyes were looking you over
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>thought it's not like you weren't getting a good look at him yourself. He'd swapped out his usual khaki cloak for a light grey wide collar suit with the jacket extended to still have that familiar silhouette
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>and his mane that he'd been working on to the last minute seemed to almost be catching the light to give itself warm orange highlights
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>suffice to say you were both thoroughly enraptured with one another
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>which means someone had to step up to get you two moving forward with the date before you ended up standing there all night
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>"Psst! Hey! Talk to her like you practiced!" Anonymous' sister said in the loudest whisper you'd ever heard said
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>that seemed to do it, as Anon started stammering once you both pulled your eyes off each other and pretended you hadn't just been caressing one another with your gazes
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>doing so let you see that his sister was standing on the stairs, trying not to be seen
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"Um, hello," you said to her without thinking
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>she gasped and bolted behind a small table on the upstairs balcony. Yo could still clearly see her flank sticking out from it
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>"No sense hiding, Anonymity. She already saw you." Moon Dancer said stepping out of one of the upstairs rooms
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"Heard you, too. That open window doesn't keep much in," you said with a laugh, trying to lighten the tension
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>"Knew we should have kept it closed," Anon said dejectedly
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>Moon started making her way downstairs. "And choke on all the mane product? No thanks. Hello, Twilight."
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>"Hi Miss Princess Twilight. You look very pretty!" Anonymity sheepishly followed Moon Dancer
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"Thank you. I had quite a bit of help from my friends. And looks like you had some help from yours, too," you said to Anonymous. "What happened to 'No one knows how better to work with this than me'?”
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>"I was convinced that getting ready for a date with a princess needed more preparation than just one pony." Anon was about to scratch his head, but recoiled his hoof to prevent himself messing up his mane
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>"He did a good enough job digging that outfit out of his trunk for the Gala, but far a DATE date? Nuh-uh, he needed all the help he could ge- mm!"
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>Anon covered his sister's mouth once she and Moon Dancer were close enough
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>"Twilight, you remember my sister, Anonymity? I think you met her a few times during our days at school."
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"I do now. Nice to meet you again," you said to her
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>"Mm-m," she responded with a wave and smile, still with her mouth covered
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>"And Moon Dancer, too."
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>"He asked if I knew anything about mane styling since every salon in town was booked full. I didn't, but I found a book on it. Just for the record, I figured you two would end up together eventually, just didn't think I'd be seeing it at the news stands," she said with a light laugh
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"Haha, yeah, neither did we," you found it very hard to make eye contact with her at that moment. "Wait, you figured?"
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>"Yeah. So did Twinkleshine, Minuette, Lemon Hearts, most of our teachers, probably also Princess Celestia. Really, anyone that ever saw how you two got in each other's faces figured it would happen eventually. I don't know anypony else that would keep going out of their way to talk to someone they argue with as much as you two seemed to."
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>Anonymity moved her head to be able to speak again. "You should have seen how sad he got when he heard you moved out of Canterlot. He was planning a big exhibit of all the magic stuff he brought from across Equestria. Moped around saying stuff like 'There's no point to this if she's not here to admit I'm the better uni-'mm!"
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>her mouth was covered again, this time making her noticeably upset at her brother
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>"ANYWAY, we better get going. Almost time for the reservation and, uh, Princess Cadance will want to hear about how this went down so thanks for your help, guys."
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>you gave Moon Dancer and Anonymity a nice goodbye and bow and walked back to the chariot with Anonymous by your side
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>once it was in the air you both waved to the girls on the ground
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>"Make sure you save your arguments for after dessert!" Moon Dancer jokingly called out
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>"Bring him back in one piece!" Anonymity added
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