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Strange Waifus

By AnalPlugAnon
Created: 2020-12-25 20:02:43
Expiry: Never

/swt/strange waifu

1.
>You are Anon.
2.
>Your bed is EXTRA comfy today.
3.
>You wonder why.
4.
>You feel something soft and warm snuggle you.
5.
>Do you have another night-time visitor?
6.
>These fucking horses, man.
7.
>They can't seem to comprehend that you sleep alone.
8.
>Fucking herd mentality....
9.
>"Time to wake up, Anon."
10.
>Oh, who's this?
11.
>Something soft and silky tickles your ear.
12.
>You NOPE and open your eyes.
13.
>....Nobody is there.
14.
>NoPONY, rather.
15.
>You hear a chuckle from down by your groin.
16.
>"I'm down here, silly!"
17.
>You do what the voice says and....
18.
>Your blanket has a face on it.
19.
>Like, not just sewn on or something, but an actual three-dimensional face.
20.
>A pony face, specifically.
21.
>One of the corners of your pony-blanket comes up and caresses your cheek.
22.
>"Good morning, love."
23.
>Why is this happening?
24.
>Your blanket wasn't like this when you went to bed.
25.
>You try to sit up, but only succeed in rolling off of your pillow.
26.
>You're all wrapped up!
27.
>>"Aww, why did you make him go?"
28.
>A fluffy shuffling comes from behind you, and your goddamn PILLOW crawls onto your head and licks your ear.
29.
>Fuck your life and everything about it.
30.
31.
>You are Anon and you're sitting on your couch eating breakfast.
32.
>You've got blanketwaifu wrapped around your shoulders, and pillowaifu on your lap nuzzling your crotch.
33.
"So, what's the deal with you two?"
34.
>You'd remained quiet this entire time. This shit was too raw to deal with before coffee and cereal.
35.
>Blanket: "What do you mean, dearest? There is no 'deal' with us. I keep you warm at night..."
36.
>You watch as a corner of Blanketwaifu nudges Pillowaifu.
37.
>Pillow: "...And I keep your head comfy and ready for good dreams."
38.
>Aww.
39.
>That's almost cute.
40.
"No, look.... Why are you suddenly alive? God knows you weren't like this last night."
41.
>Pillowaifu laughs at you.
42.
>Pillow: "Honey, stop being so silly. Now, I know you're usually kind of tired in the mornings; why don't you lay your head on me and take a nap?"
43.
>Blanketwaifu joins in on the teasing.
44.
>Blanket: "Mmmm, let me wrap around you, Anon. I know just how to make you warm."
45.
>L-lewd.
46.
>After a few more minutes of increasingly dirty talk, you concede and have a hap on your couch.
47.
>You wake up to Blanketwaifu grinding your crotch, and Pillowaifu sniffing your hair.
48.
>These fucking waifus.
49.
50.
>You're eating breakfast when it happens.
51.
>"Mmmph lmvvph ynrnn cckkckkk"
52.
>You're sorry, what?
53.
>That's when you feel something tickle your balls.
54.
>Understandably surprised, you stand up and rip your pants off.
55.
>Thankfully, your pants remain silent.
56.
>You think you've reached waifu critical mass.
57.
>Looking down (up?) at you is a ponyface on your boxers.
58.
>She's got a sultry look in her eyes, and your cock is poking out of her mouth.
59.
>.......Oh.
60.
>Okay, that makes sense.
61.
>Her mouth is exactly where that cock-slit on the front of your underwear is.
62.
>Boxerwaifu is blushing something fierce as she tries to reverse-blowjob you.
63.
>With a wet slurp, she sucks your dick back into the strangely warm and furry confines of your underwear.
64.
>Boxer: "You don't wash me often enough."
65.
>She licks her "lips".
66.
>Boxer: "I love that."
67.
68.
>You walk back into your living room, ready to confront your pillow and your blanket.
69.
>They're probably in on this bullshit right here.
70.
>Even for horseland this shit is weird.
71.
>Pillowaifu: "Are you okay, Anon? We heard some positively lewd noises. Why didn't you come for us?"
72.
>Boxerwaifu: "He nearly did."
73.
>Pillowaifu: "Boxers! Blanket, wake up! It's Boxers!"
74.
>These assholes know each other?
75.
>Blanketwaifu squeals with delight and waves you over with a corner of herself.
76.
>Blanketwaifu: "Anon! Quick, sit on Pillow's face! Let's get a group hug!"
77.
>You reluctantly obey your Blanketwaifu's orders and sit down on your couch on top of Pillowaifu.
78.
>Blanketwaifu wraps around your groin, and you're left with a weird pillow-diaper that can talk.
79.
>You can feel some grinding in your crotch, and you aren't sure who's doing what, or if it's on purpose.
80.
>Probably is.
81.
>Why do you have such strange waifus?