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                                            1.
                                            >Day "cut to the chase" in Equestria
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                                            2.
                                            >An assumedly autistic yellow-haired, pink-maned pony is screaming on your porch
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                                            3.
                                            >Or, you know she's screaming
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                                            4.
                                            >But screaming for her is about the same volume as polite conversation for anyone else
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                                            5.
                                            >"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa", she screams
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                                            6.
                                            Fluttershy, please stop. I just want to get the mail.
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                                            7.
                                            >Beyond her, by your front gate, Derpy waves at you
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                                            8.
                                            >You take a step forward, and Flutterbutt tries to nip at your ankle, making you stumble backwards
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                                            9.
                                            >She looks up at you for a moment, pleading
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                                            10.
                                            >"S-stand b-b-back, Anon! I'm b-beginning to morb!"
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                                            11.
                                            >Before going right back to clenching her eyes shut and yelling at your porch
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                                            12.
                                            >"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
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                                            13.
                                            Fluttershy, come on. This is dumb.
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                                            14.
                                            >"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
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                                            15.
                                            I don't even like Morbius.
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                                            16.
                                            >"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
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                                            17.
                                            You don't even like it either. You were so busy hating on the movie with me that you didn't even try anything in the theater.
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                                            18.
                                            >"aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa"
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                                            19.
                                            >Back at the front gate, Derpy has gotten so uncomfortable that she's begun trotting in place
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                                            20.
                                            "Hey Derps", you yell across the yard, "just hold it for me at the post office, I'll come by later!"
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                                            21.
                                            >A look of relief snaps onto her face before she hightails away from your gate
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                                            22.
                                            >You back inside and close the door
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                                            23.
                                            >Stupid Morbius
 
                         by Greggums
                         by Greggums
                         by Greggums
                         by Greggums
                         by Greggums